Ibu.

Bismillah.

Aku selalu tanya Ibu, "Am I good enough for anything right now?" Bila aku tanya soalan macam ni, Ibu punya reply simple gila. -- "God sends His strongest, fiercest soldiers out for war. War eh, bukan gang fight bawah blok."

Aku melalak malam-malam buta, tumbuk cermin sampai pecah. Ibu sorang je tak cakap apa-apa. Sebab Ibu faham. Dia faham anak dia sakit mental. Dia sedar anak dia tak betul. Dia tahu anak dia kena makan anti-depressant pills. Tapi dia tak pernah complain.

Mungkin pasal aku ni anak dia.
Buruk perangai aku pun; ANAK DIA. Buruk sikap aku pun; ANAK DIA.

Aku heran jugak lah kenapa dia rilek je bila aku cerita semua hal hidup aku kat dia. Dia kata dia suka. Sebab sekurang-kurangnya, anak dia ni ingat jugak nak ajak dia berbual walaupun kerja makan gaji keluar pagi balik malam.

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She's the last person I know who will ever give up on me. I foresee, even if I'm put in a mental institute one day, she'll sit by my bed and feed me my meals. She'll comb my hair. She'll take me for a walk. She'll put me to sleep and repeat the whole cycle till I die.

I just hope I'll die before she does. So I wont have to trouble her anymore and see how much more she has to invest in me just to see me happy. And so I dont have to be lost when she's no longer around. Because honestly... without a Queen, even I as her princess, wont even know how to sit like a girl.

Ibu, this is for you. ��